The Personality Assessment

reading time :3 minutes.

TIP: once you resonate with a type, only then read the subsequent action points. else move on, till you find the one that resonates the most with you. 

don't forget to have fun!

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✨According to a research by Dr Valerie Young, the common pattern of behavioral and psychological symptoms in a person are broadly divided into 5 groups of people:

  1. perfectionist
  2. super human
  3. natural genius
  4. soloist
  5. the expert

 

This exercise will help you identify the kind of personality that you are and everything around it. Why this or how this might help? Well, when you know more surely the way you function/ react / act - it’s a lot easier to make the smaller necessary changes in order to make bigger changes in life.✨

AIM: In order for us to know and execute how can we relieve our stress, we need to know the cause of it or the WHY of it’s existence.

DISCLAIMER: Now these questions, ideas and subsequent suggestions are not carved in stone or need to be tightly defined, but these give a general idea of who you are or where you are at.

PRO TIP: All these may or may not fully resonate with your personality, so we stick to something that’s closest/ has most amount of similarity with you.


 

1 . ARE YOU THE PERFECTIONIST ‼️

  • You set unrealistically high goals for self that cannot be achieved without incurring stress
  • When you don’t achieve goals you feel like a failure
  • Even if you do achieve them, you still feel like a failure cos you think you dint set them high enough, thus missing an opportunity and doing poorly at goal setting
  • Maybe you have a obsessive need to control everything, cannot delegate to others or let things go
  • A is not as good enough as 100% as your motto
  • Maybe you don’t feel comfortable unless you micro manage others/things


IF THIS SOUNDS FAMILIAR, HERE ARE A FEW REMINDERS FOR YOU TO HELP YOU EASE UP ON YOUR EXPECTATIONS .....

  1. We learn more through our failures than our successes, a hard lesson but one that we need to learn to execute in order to alleviate stress. ASK - Will the failure still matter in a year or 5?
  2. Analyze and/or acknowledge your mistakes to find a better way or prevent something like this from happening again in the future.
  3. Life is not linear, its cyclical. There will always be waves, we cannot extrapolate success or failure. Not every decision can be more successful than previous one - look for over all shift and general trends in your success
  4. Things not in our control, having external factors will always remain that way. We cannot control them. We have to learn to let go.

 

🚩ACTION :  What behavior do you recognize that you find yourself imitating ? What is that one thing you can do to start making that change in it. Write it down on a post it or someplace where you can see it to remember it easily. This will help you to act upon it with less resistance. 



 

2. ARE YOU THE SUPER HUMAN ‼️

  • Do you feel like you work much harder than everyone around?
  • You are first in & last out/first to wake up and last to sleep
  • Your holidays & off days are work still days
  • Are you trying to compensate/deal with your insecurity about what you perceive to be your shortcomings?
  • Do you feel Stressed or fear of missing out (FOMO) when you are not doing something!
  • Feel like you have not earned your title - no matter how long you have held it or How long you have held it
  • Maybe addicted to validation you seek from work / ppl

(These habits are not conducive to good mental health/happiness.)

 

THESE BEHAVIORS SOUND LIKE YOU THEN HERE’S WHAT YOU CAN REMEMBER TO DO TO RELIEVE PRESSURE OF BEING SUPER.

  1. Learn to take criticism constructively and not personally - - - use it to enhance your skills or productivity or efficiency (because often times it’s not the person being criticized, it’s their root behavior that gets the limelight.)
  2. Become more attuned to your internal validation rather than external - - -  (seeking external validation stems from low self esteem, low self confidence. If that is an identified/identifiable trait in you, then you do need to work on it with a professional to find the root cause)
  3. Take time off, put your communication devices away and actively get engaged in non work related leisure activities

🚩ACTION : Sit with yourself, alone, no devices no people.. in a space that you enjoy being in. Think about all that you read above and just absorb or accept. That is the first step towards relieving the stress you are carrying as self pressure.

Keep a journal. Try this a few times and see what comes up.




3. YOU ARE A NATURAL GENIUS ‼️

  • You think you can accomplish something, but cannot get there fast enough, and without much effort then you must be bad at it. - - - Read this slowly.
  • You may not want a mentor or outside help cos needing someone is a sign of weakness
  • You have always been held to a high standard in school/college - so you are attached to expectations
  • Teachers praised you as smart & ahead of peers
  • How to match pace with expectations?


IF THIS SOUNDS FAMILIAR, HERE ARE A FEW REMINDERS FOR YOU TO HELP YOU MANAGE THE GENIUS IN YOU...

  1. Always remind yourself that you are a work in progress
  2. You cannot always be best at everything
  3. Be sure to embrace lifelong learning - help you develop consistently n progressively
  4. Aim to learn something new every single day and know more next year than you do now!

P.S. Instead of feeling like a failure or fraud, feel confident in your ability to learn n grow - Recognize your knowledge and progress.

 

🚩ACTION : For the next one week/few days, before starting your day or ending it, recognize and write 3 things that you feel proud of for yourself from the day. It could be the way you handled an argument or did some quick thinking etc etc.

Keep a journal.

See what you discover about yourself. And feel free to continue this exercise till you are able to do this in your head without pen & paper.

 

 

 

4. ARE YOU THE SOLOIST ‼️

  • You refuse assistance as getting help means that you are a fraud & don’t deserve to be where you are
  • You routinely say you don’t need anyone’s help
  • You go to any means necessary to do something yourself, stretch yourself all the way
  • You try to prove your worth by doing more on your own rather than focusing on effectiveness and collaboration


IF THIS RESONATES WITH WHO YOU ARE, HERE ARE A FEW IDEAS TO HELP YOU BECOME MORE CONNECTED...

  1. Know when seeking and accepting help will benefit you
  2. Make a point to seek assistance at least once per week even if you feel you don’t need it- - -This will help you overcome awkwardness asking for help when you really do need it
  3. Recognize other people also have expertise, and that you can probably learn from them in collaboration. This can make the process more efficient

 

🚩ACTION : Do this once a day or in two days.  - - - If you could ask, what would you ask someone as a step towards seeking assistance. Define the assistance and also identify a person for it. Don’t worry, you only need to spell it and identify it, until you feel ready enough to execute it




5. YOU ARE THE EXPERT‼️

  • You feel the need to know everything about your subject area
  • You fear being asked something by someone who knows more about any one thing and thus being exposed as being incompetent
  • You have acquired multiple certifications n degrees (so that you can prove your worth to people)
  • You continually feel inadequate
  • You feel that if you don’t meet 100% of requirements for something, you are not good enough to do it


IF YOU THINK YOU MAY BE AN EXPERT TYPE WITH IMPOSTER SYNDROME, HERE ARE SOME THINGS YOU CAN START WITH TO MANAGE THAT ...

  1. Practice just in-time learning like watching YouTube videos
  2. Access coaching / quality resource to go through a topic when you have a client who needs help with that
  3. Mentor a junior colleague in your area of expertise - - This will help you see how much further you are than certain people around you and it’ll help you sharpen your skills and insights.

 

‼️ POSSIBLE CAUSES OF FEELING THE Imposter.Syndrome.

  • Feeling like an outsider- Wanting to fit in -sometimes minus cause
  • Feel like a fraud
  • Recognize that you are facing it


🚩ACTION : Pick any one thing to do from above that you think you are good to try. Make it your secret project till you are feeling bold enough to share your find with others.

 

‼️ BELIEVE  you are not an imposter! That’s the first step. You are you. And that’s your super power. You won’t want to walk out with another person’s problem - ever.


PRO TIP : No one person in a group is more powerful than everyone else in the group together!!!❤️


REMEMBER : If someone expresses doubt about your abilities, remember seeking or over valuing external validation will only set you up for failure. People are usually doubtful because of their own insecurities! Including us.

 


HOW TO BREAK THROUGH STRESS AND ANXIETY

1, face it before managing it.

2, schedule a pause. Assess. Know. Re calibrate and then move forward

3, do one thing at a time, just the next thing, no need to bring in overwhelm, remind yourself in your mind as many times as you need to - to just focus on the next step.

4, get started on the smallest next step, nothing big.

5, talk to your self. Say the things you would love to hear from others.

 

OTHER THINGS YOU CAN DO

1, breathe n and smile. Nothing is this world is not solvable.

2, be a friend of your mind ! Don’t be harsh with it, watch your language. This is how you become your own friend.

3, it all begins with you.


Hope this helped you in getting to know somethings about you that you were not aware of - like AHA moments. Try doing the action steps as suggested, and if you feel stuck anywhere, book a call to take your journey ahead with me. 

I am always here for you.

Dee Kanjani.